The Phoenix Rises, My Father’s Journey Home
It was mid-summer and my husband and I were camping on Mt. Adams in the Pacific Northwest. My brother called unexpectedly, his voice couldn't conceal his concern, “It’s time to come, Dad is near the end.” A call like that is never easy to receive—it shook me. I took a moment to reflect on my father, his life and our relationship.
In my mind’s eye I saw my father, Richard, or rather a translucent version of him, standing near his body, connected by a luminous silver cord. Mildred & Ben, his parents (my grandparents) were a short distance away, quite alive but translucent.
From my experience, relatives who have passed often leave the Afterlife to help guide people, (well, their souls), Home when it is time to die. I knew my brother was right … his transition from this world was near, if what I was seeing in my intuition was accurate.
We packed up camp and started the complicated, but breathtaking journey from Mt. Adams, Washington through the Snoqualamie pass, across the Puget Sound to Whidby Island … praying, crying and laughing deeply as we regaled each other with hilarious “Dad” stories.
The last ferry was imminently leaving from Seattle and we made it! I closed my eyes & checked my inner-guidance again. My Dad’s mother, Mildred (her spirit) had moved in closer to the foot of Richard’s bed. I knew his earthly sojourn was coming to a close.
At his home we were greeted by loving family that had been attending to him with great care. A hospital bed was in the living room & he was now comatose. It was a powerful and emotional moment. My mind raced … “had I been a good daughter? Yes, well, sort of; the truth was that I could have done a better job. I felt guilty. Did I tell him I loved him last time we talked? Yes, yes, I did! Thank Goddess.” Now I was grateful … in our last conversation two weeks prior, my father & I had also strategized about our afterlife communication;
“Hey Dad, when you make it Home to Heaven, will you give me a sign?” I gingerly requested.
“I’m not sure if I will survive death, let alone make it to the Great Beyond — you live, you die … then pfffts, that’s it.” My father was funny even in his last act.
“Well, I have it on pretty good authority that you will live beyond your physical death,” I offered. Being an ardent intellectual and devout atheist, he did not believe an afterlife existed. “Let’s come up with a sign you can send me … just in case you make it to the pearly gates. How about something like a butterfly or a penny”
He said thoughtfully after a long silence, “A Phoenix.” A Phoenix suited him perfectly.
Reflecting on our last conversation, gratitude welled up in my heart. It was time to create space for his transition. We gathered Dad’s photos, important possessions and a white candle on the coffee table. Then we set Drawing prayer for my dying father up a laptop playing classical music, Bach cello suites—his soul could use the music to be lifted up. We placed lilies & roses near his head & heart.
I closed my eyes & checked in … both my father’s parents, were floating closer … now at the foot of his bed. I knew Dad’s time on Earth was becoming coming to a close.
Finally it was time to actively focus my thoughts … I pray best with my pencil, it helps me focus my head & heart with my intention. Sitting next to my father’s comatose body I drew his face, then the phoenix symbol … his parents, Mildred & Ben (drawing on previous page). As the images flowed, I opened my heart and sent compassion and love to him. I started to sketch a halo over his head but froze when I heard a startling “NO” in my mind, so I stopped. Hmmm, I guess he is telling me is not an angel yet! Next I drew the doorway to Heaven, and over it, Welcome. “Maybe this will help him find the way,” I reasoned to myself.
My husband bent down to whisper in my father’s ear, “We’re all here Richard, and complete, if you are. Your son & I can take care of the family. If you need to go … we have this covered. It’s ok to be free … love you always.” I closed my eyes & checked in on my guidance with my mind’s eye again: Mildred’s spirit had moved the head of her son’s bed. Just then the doorbell rang — Hospice had arrived for a visit.
Allowing them privacy, I left and walked alone down his long wooded driveway, my mind numb from the hugeness of out all. Without warning, a warm blanket of effervescent love-energy wrapped around me … Richard? Daddy? In my mind’s eye my father stood, wearing is favorite photographer’s vest and leather US Post Office satchel. He was hurrying down his driveway, as if late for an important meeting … was he heading home?
Then he sent a gift — a powerful feeling of unconditional love that permeated every cell and into my heart … like a soul-hug. My body vibrated with happiness! You see in life, my father was reserved with his affection, we had not been close … so feeling his unbounded love was truly precious healing gift. Then his translucent image was off, hurrying down the rest of the driveway, perhaps for the bridge to heaven!
My brother called from the house, “Jane, come quick … Dad has passed … just now!”
“Yes, yes he did,” I thought to myself.
At his bedside I placed three lilies on his heart, roses around his head & rose petals over his body. As I picked up my pencil to finish my final goodbye … my hand automatically drew, seemingly without my instruction, a halo over my dad’s head. This time I could complete it.
After three days … he rose again—at least that was when the Phoenix signs began … and they were so frequent it was stupefying. His tendency to show off seemed to have follow him to the Afterlife.
Soon after, while driving to Mt. Shasta for a conference, we passed Phoenix, Oregon, semi trucks had phoenix emblems and Phoenix Red was the featured beer at dinner that night. My booth neighbor sold T-shirts boldly sporting phoenix patterns and Phoenix Roofing was working across the road, and on and on.
Was this my father's message from the other side? In my heart there is no doubt … Dad had made it across that bridge … he had made it Home to Heaven.